Shame, the Bain of Christian Living

Shame is a powerful emotional response to our sense of personal guilt. There is a sense of shame when we realize our choices, behaviors, aspects of our lives are unholy in the presence of our most Holy God. Today, I speak of profound shame, a shame born of a maturing awareness of the Holiness of God. There have been times in my life when I give serious thought to the whole of life I find pockets of deep embarrassment regarding things I have done or things left undone. Often when looking backward, looking to my past, I still feel deep shame. The older I become, the more I discover of the beauty of the Holiness of God, I find myself captured in my shame.

As a Christian, I am very confident that God has forgiven me of every iniquity in my life; there is not a single sin that God has not, is not or will not forgive. I am confident in God's forgiveness for my hope is in the merciful Christ as expressed in the crucifixion of Jesus for me. And while I am confident, I find myself feeling shame about myself and my sin. For me personally, this has been a haunting experience of awareness. There are moments in this life that I find it very difficult to present myself to God when He calls to me. While being drawn to God by the power of his love, grace, and mercy, God's holiness is so contrasting to the sin in my life. Sin brings awareness when in the presence of our Holy God. Please consider Adam and Eve and the awareness born of willful sin:

Gen 3:7 7 Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths. ESV

Because they lived and thrived in the presence of our Holy God, their disobedience was in stark contrast and conflict with Holiness. Adam and Eve "knew they were naked." Their nakedness was a condition of being hidden in the Holiness of God. In the Holiness of God, they were protected from the awareness of sin. So significant was the realization, Adam and Eve attempted to cover themselves, even daring to hide from God's presence when God came into their presence.

Gen 3:8-10 8 And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, "Where are you?" 10 And he said, "I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself." ESV

Shame and fear in an instant took control of there emotion and reasoning. Adam quickly blamed Eve; Eve deflected the blame towards the Serpent, neither Adam or Eve offered repentance or sought forgiveness.

Why are the events of the Garden of Eden, of Adam and Eve, their encounter with the Serpent and sin so relevant to Christians today? Like Adam and Eve before their fall, before they sinned, they enjoyed the presence of our Holy God. Likewise, we too through the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ, God dwells with us and we, like Adam and Eve, commit sin his presence. Shame can become a river of guilt and grief. As Christians, the holiness of God is our protection and our disobedience before God's face causes shame. Confessionally, I admit there are times when my repentance is not adequate to assuage the deep shame I experience when God's grace and mercy call me into His presence. 

There is more, more than transcending hope, there is healing from our shame. Jack Wellman in his blog, the Christian Crier, shares the following:

Isaiah 61:7 “Instead of your shame there shall be a double portion; instead of dishonor they shall rejoice in their lot; therefore in their land, they shall possess a double portion; they shall have everlasting joy.” 

"Isaiah the Prophet is one of Jesus’ favorite authors to quote and this entire chapter seems to be about Him, but also about what He does. When you consider that God “forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy” (Psalm 103:3-4), it should lift your spirits. That verse does not exclude you because you’ve got everlasting life and that ought to give you joy, so whether you’re feeling shame right now or not, whomever God places His love upon, it remains forever."

 In closing, I have learned the value of not just confession and repentance, but when I ask for healing from my shame, more than cleansing, Jesus wipes away all my tears…there is beauty in true brokenness in the presence of our Holy God.

by Grace Alone!

www.hcfcc.org